I am now eighteen weeks. Alysha and I were just discussing just how FAST this whole thing is going by. I am heading fast towards month number 5. She said maybe it is because I am really not showing yet. When I do, maybe it will be different. Right now it is just a number. Of course, I can feel that baby do his exercises, normally about 30 minutes after I lay down for bed. Isn't that always how it is?
I do not think this is a prison sentence, as my title indicates, BUT... (there's always a but), I have been thinking. This countdown to may 2 is fun and all, but the baby being born is just the beginning, not the end. I do not cross the finish line come may 2 and I am done. On the contrary, my fun is only beginning. My life is about to change dramatically. It is so funny what people that you hardly know will tell you when they find out your are expecting. I was talking to a lady at church the other day. She has three kids, 13, 9 and 19 months. Now most people, when they find out the age difference between my babies, (yes, alysha is a baby), they have a comment. Usually something like I cannot believe you are having another one, better you than me.... blah blah. Basically, they think I am crazy. (Everyone is entitled to their opinion, although I seem to get theirs whether I ask for it or not.) Anyway, back to the church-lady. She proceeds to tell me that when she had her last one she was frustrated and depressed for a long time at the loss of her freedoms. She tells all about how hard it was, again, blah blah. By the way, this is the second time she has seen me and told me this story. Now, the first thing that pops into my head (both times) is "Did this not happen when you had your first two?"
I guess people are just being nice and trying to prepare me for what they think is to come. I hear all kinds of stuff, many times from strangers. One comment I get alot is how great a help it is going to be having an older child. I always laugh and say that I have a built-in babysitter. Alysha appreciates this. But, 90% of the time, it is some kind of negative comment about how hard life is gonna be. What can you do?
I am aware of what it means to have a baby. I know it has been a long time and this time I do not live anywhere near my mother. That will be the hardest, simply because I will not have any family to help me out. I remember when Alysha was small, even going to the store was a major ordeal. I do know that I will be severely limited and life will revolve around the baby. So, that being said, I am not naive enough to think everyday is going to be roses. Babies are alot of work, but this is what we wanted all along. I mean, we have been trying for a long time, we did this ON PURPOSE. I think it is a happy occasion, something to look forward to, not dread. I am aware life is going to change and it is a change I wanted. This is why we made the decision for me not to work, so I could be with this baby at least the first year. This has always been our dream to have a baby and for me to be able to stay home and take care of it. I was not able to do that with Alysha, I had to work.
I do have one good stranger story. I took alysha bowling with the homeschooling group the other day. This one mom, whom I have never met before, starts asking me questions about the baby and stuff and then she said the most uplifting thing. She was in the same situation as me, she has a daughter in college right now and she also has a ten year old. She said it is like having two only children. That is so cool! I love that. It is like having two only children. That is a really interesting way to look at it. There are definite benefits to having only one at a time. She even said her kids are really close, even though they are so far apart in age. That has been one of my biggest worries. (really my only worry).
I do not think this is a prison sentence, as my title indicates, BUT... (there's always a but), I have been thinking. This countdown to may 2 is fun and all, but the baby being born is just the beginning, not the end. I do not cross the finish line come may 2 and I am done. On the contrary, my fun is only beginning. My life is about to change dramatically. It is so funny what people that you hardly know will tell you when they find out your are expecting. I was talking to a lady at church the other day. She has three kids, 13, 9 and 19 months. Now most people, when they find out the age difference between my babies, (yes, alysha is a baby), they have a comment. Usually something like I cannot believe you are having another one, better you than me.... blah blah. Basically, they think I am crazy. (Everyone is entitled to their opinion, although I seem to get theirs whether I ask for it or not.) Anyway, back to the church-lady. She proceeds to tell me that when she had her last one she was frustrated and depressed for a long time at the loss of her freedoms. She tells all about how hard it was, again, blah blah. By the way, this is the second time she has seen me and told me this story. Now, the first thing that pops into my head (both times) is "Did this not happen when you had your first two?"
I guess people are just being nice and trying to prepare me for what they think is to come. I hear all kinds of stuff, many times from strangers. One comment I get alot is how great a help it is going to be having an older child. I always laugh and say that I have a built-in babysitter. Alysha appreciates this. But, 90% of the time, it is some kind of negative comment about how hard life is gonna be. What can you do?
I am aware of what it means to have a baby. I know it has been a long time and this time I do not live anywhere near my mother. That will be the hardest, simply because I will not have any family to help me out. I remember when Alysha was small, even going to the store was a major ordeal. I do know that I will be severely limited and life will revolve around the baby. So, that being said, I am not naive enough to think everyday is going to be roses. Babies are alot of work, but this is what we wanted all along. I mean, we have been trying for a long time, we did this ON PURPOSE. I think it is a happy occasion, something to look forward to, not dread. I am aware life is going to change and it is a change I wanted. This is why we made the decision for me not to work, so I could be with this baby at least the first year. This has always been our dream to have a baby and for me to be able to stay home and take care of it. I was not able to do that with Alysha, I had to work.
I do have one good stranger story. I took alysha bowling with the homeschooling group the other day. This one mom, whom I have never met before, starts asking me questions about the baby and stuff and then she said the most uplifting thing. She was in the same situation as me, she has a daughter in college right now and she also has a ten year old. She said it is like having two only children. That is so cool! I love that. It is like having two only children. That is a really interesting way to look at it. There are definite benefits to having only one at a time. She even said her kids are really close, even though they are so far apart in age. That has been one of my biggest worries. (really my only worry).
1 comment:
You won't have your mom nearby, but you have Jon this time ;). So you won't be alone with the responsibilities, even now :).
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